101 Ways - A Little Help from Unbiased Parties

I thought I would ask those out there how they forgive or get over years of mistreatment, or hurt, or anger?  That might mean you've been mentally abused, or someone stole your homework for years, or a coworker continuously steals credit for a project. 

When the guilty party never actually accepts that they are the ones at fault do you simply turn your back and stay guarded realizing that history has continued to repeat itself?  Or do you pretend like they just might change and then are astonished when something does happen, again?  I have in the past, forgiven and forgetten the first few times something happens, but after the tenth time your constitution starts to waver.  It finally hits you, that yes this will continue to happen unless you make a change.  My change?  I try and create distance in most cases. Sometimes I've stood up for myself just to realize that deaf ears are on the recieving end.

How do you handle a situation where a person in your life continuously wrongs you?  If they swear up and down they are changing what does it take to believe them - when in the past the words were purely said to apparently appease you?

If my problems were spiders I would simply step on them and call it a day.

What's in Your Fridge?

Holy Cow Moment?:  Have you ever woken up to see the cereal in the fridge?  What about legos?
 
As parents we have all been so tired at one point or another that we put the milk in the cupboard or leave out the coffee creamer.  What makes life even more fun is when your toddler can reach the fridge and starts leaving little surprises that make you laugh.  Everyone needs a rubber ducky in the veggie drawer right? Just don't try and cook it.

My house appears to be in constant turmoil. The more my child can reach the more things that I have now lost.  The more she moves the more items that are scattered everywhere.  Yesterday I spend nearly thirty minutes trying to find my makeup.  I guess its like an adult scavenger hunt, just without any clues. 

What would we do without our children to ruin the house. 

Holy Cow no matter how much I try and clean after work and on weekends, she can undo my efforts in less then ten minutes. 

When Mom's Away - Who Knows What Might Happen

Holy Cow Moment ?: I think my child and husband have a better time when I am not around.

It's sad to think that they don't miss me but I think it's a reality when you get a picture as I did today.  Thank you technology for allowing my husband to share the havoc my child and himself were causing to her small hairs.

I shake my head still.  The Text that came through: Look someone found mommies hair clips inspires fear in my heart. No, not because I worry about lost of broken items but because I know my husbands lack of hair talents.  I hope the photos show because I just don't think I can do them justice in words.

Holy Cow how can you not laugh at life.  The one time my daughter doesn't pull out hair clips is when her father puts them in.  Of course. 

Let the Food Aversions Begin

Holy Cow Moment ?: Who knew pasta could be so revolting.

Baby number two officially doesn't like pasta or rather marinara sauce.  Friday morning as I packed my lunch for work the sight of leftover spaghetti made me go running for the bathroom.  Who knew?

My first pregnancy I craved more then I was repelled by, which is probably why I gained a ton of weight. Or, it was a lot, according to those stupid charts that doctors pass out.  You know the ones... The charts that say if you weight more than a bird you can't gain anything.  I always wanted to ask how it is they can tell a poor pregnant woman they are fat. I made a spleen today, what did you do?

Anyway, for now I am cutting out one carb - pasta, so that should help this time around.

Holy Cow everything I knew from baby number 1 isn't going to be squat for baby number 2, at least during the pregnancy.

The Cost to Raise Our Kids

I had a different post in mind for today but thanks to MSN I had to change my mind. 
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Holy Cow Moment #?:  We all knew raising children had a hefty price tag but who knew Colorado (the state in which I live) could make that cost even more.  Don't worry Illinois, Massachusetts and 7 other states you all got recognition too.

Thank you MSN for brightening my day.  Colorado is number 4 on the list of most expensive states to raise a child.  Yes you read that right.  NUMBER 4. It's enough to make me want to cry.  I knew raising a baby - well 2, wasn't going to be cheap but when the average of childcare is as high as it is that just makes it all the more worse. 

It's bad when I saw the MSN post today and all I could think was "oh please let my state be on there."  No it wasn't because I wanted bragging rights.  It was because I feel like I pay A LOT for childcare and I just can't believe we are 'cheap.'  Well I suppose I feel vindicated - or robbed.  I suppose I have mixed feelings on knowing the truth. 

Oh well.  What can we do.  Like they say.  If you wait to be able to afford a child you will never have them and I can't see my life without my daughter.  Sorry baby two, I don't know you yet to say the same. 

Holy Cow its highway robbery.  Everyone says you can't put a price tag on the value your child adds to your life too bad we can put a number to what they take away.  I did just say she was worth it right?

Annihilation of the Competition

Holy Cow Moment ?: I thought raising my daughter and having her reach toddler-hood was going to be the hardest challenge for me. I was wrong. Apparently it's going to be keeping the new baby alive in order to be born.

Mommy is always the favorite toy,but up until recently my stomach was never the target. Now I have to watch what I am doing or how I am laying in order to protect the new spawn. Why? My daughter is trying to take out the competition.

Okay, so I don't think she knows what she is doing. Because if she did then I guess she really would be evil. As of right now I think it's all coincidence. We all like to tell ourselves that our children are our husbands evil spawn but I don't think we actually believe it...do we?

Holy Cow how will I raise two children when one is inadvertently trying to take out the other.

For those with multiples how did you do it?

When “Advice” Goes Wrong

ADVISORY: This is a rant.  Do not take anything personal - but if you notice you may be a culprit or a victim then you may laugh with me.  Culprit's learn from your mistakes.

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Holy Crap Cow Moment ?: When is enough enough? How do you stop the "advice diarrhea?"

  How much advice is useful?  Well, when the advice in unsolicited sometimes none.  While you are pregnant you hear everyone’s thoughts and opinions, which can get annoying, but what happens after the baby is here?

 

For the most part you will always hear the “if you just did this, that wouldn’t happen.”  Although most likely a lot of parents you know or run into will say “oh, we had that same issue and this is how we dealt…”  Which is advice based on experience, okay, I think that can be helpful.

Sadly though there are some that step over the bounds and criticize.  Maybe criticize isn’t what they mean to do but when they can’t approve of a single thing that you are doing to raise your child that is exactly what they are doing.  Easy to overlook one or two comments, harder when you reach the fiftieth.

How do you handle the grandparent/parent/family member/friend/etc that know everything? 

• Sure you can ignore the advice, but at some point they get offended.  (Yes I know, I tried)
•  So next step, explain how your parenting is different.  Now you are being disrespectful and saying they are wrong (which you probably are but not on purpose. People giving the ‘advice’ usually will take any disagreement of their views as rude). 
• Maybe you can avoid them as a last resort?  No, that means you are being rude and once again, disrespectful.

But what other passive alternatives are there?  Now, the above is assuming you care about the relationship with the over-advising party.

If you answered no to that last statement then my suggestion is to block the caller ID, avoid any place that person may hang out, and when all else fails run them down with any motorized option of your choice – by accident of course.
 

I would like to remind involved parties that advice is an option, not a must.  Too bad this rant will fall onto the ears of those that have the same issue opposed to those that are guilty of the crime.
 

Dictionary.com says:

 ad·vice [ad-vahys] Show IPA noun

1. an opinion or recommendation offered as a guide to action, conduct, etc.: I shall act on your advice.

2. a communication, especially from a distance, containing information: Advice from abroad informs us that the government has fallen. Recent diplomatic advices have been ominous.

3. an official notification, especially one pertaining to a business agreement: an overdue advice.